Hi Gentle Butch,I need better excuses to get out of socializing with my inlaws. There are get-togethers about once a month and I can only be sick so often, believably. I can't blame allergies because they clean better than I do and have fewer pets. They aren't horrible people, but the gatherings are really dull … Continue reading How do I get out of unpleasant in-law gatherings?
Dear Gentle Butch, I'm demisexual and I'm 23 (she/her), I'm dating a 24 yo woman, we have been together for 6 years (4 before she came out as trans girl). Months before quarantine she express she wanted to experience sex with men, but didn't wanted to break up cause she still loved me. Since we … Continue reading Is it cheating or polyamory?
Dear Gentle Butch, My young adult trans son gave us his Christmas wish list today, and it includes a packer as one of his top three wants. He sent a link to one that is very realistic-looking. I want to affirm him, but I blush at the thought of buying him a mail-order penis. Should … Continue reading Should I buy my son a mail-order penis?
Dear Gentle Butch, All my mom does all day long is nag. Clear your plate. Recycle your pop cans. Wash the pasta pot you used. Take a shower. Check your email. Put on clean clothes. What can I do to make her stop? -- Fears ugly carping kid-egging ranting Dear FUCKER, Keep clean and clean … Continue reading How can I get my mom off my back?
Dear Gentle Butch, After being unable to work anywhere except for our farm for many years because of debilitating PTSD, my health is improving. I am going back to school and have been accepted to do a full-time summer internship. People who are close to me say my health is good enough to at least … Continue reading Is trying a new thing when you’re struggling with PTSD a crime?
Dear Gentle Butch, What is the correct response to strangers telling me to put a hat/coat/socks/shoes/etc on my baby who is comfortable, happy, and not cold? -- The Baby's Mom Dear TBM, The correct response is, and it is perfectly gentle: "Go fuck yourself." I'm being gentle on you, not on them, obviously. It … Continue reading How to handle unpleasant and unsolicited parenting advice?
(Spoiler alert: the writer is me.) Dear Gentle Butch, It is I, Gentle Butch, come back from an unintentional hiatus. The thing is that I started having multiple flashbacks a day and dissociating constantly. I couldn't function at work, and I couldn't concentrate on anything. I couldn't write. Like, at ALL. So, I quit writing … Continue reading Writer asks why on earth someone who is such a mess herself thinks that she can give advice
Hello, lovely, I hope you are well! It sure is tricky to bundle all your backstory into a few brief sentences, isn't it? Here we go. I'm single, and not unhappy, but I miss romantic touch and sex. I'd adore having my own (or heck, multiple!) lover/s. Even a full-on Relationship, if I found the … Continue reading She misses romance and sex. Is her disability getting in the way?
Dear Gentle Butch, I know we aren't supposed to touch service dogs, but we can look at them, right? What if the dog approaches us first? I was walking toward a woman with a service dog on the sidewalk, and her dog was so incredibly cute! It was a beautiful shiny black Lab bursting with … Continue reading So now we can’t even say hi to a service dog?
Dear Gentle Butch, I’m physically disabled and neuro divergent with a best friend who is also neuro divergent and my aide. We’ve been best friends for seven or eight years, we have a dog together, we love doing things together, we’re roommates, and she has recently become my PCA*. A couple months ago, we hit … Continue reading How do I handle my best friend’s anger?