I really want to know how to be perceived as queer in public. I am a femme-presenting queer, and I find myself exhausted lately by the constant coming out that I’ve been doing, even in places where I think I’ve dropped every hint except tattooing a rainbow across my forehead. I spent last Thursday night defining the … Continue reading How Do I Increase My Queer Visibility?

My eight-year-old child is on-again, off-again friends with a kid, L., in his/her school. They have a lot in common and sometimes they are very close, but sometimes L. hurts my child’s feelings intentionally. I feel like L. is a bad friend and I want to tell my child to just DTMFA, (Dump The Motherfucker Already) but am I … Continue reading Someone Is Being Mean To My Kid

My wedding was a month ago, and things aren’t going very well. My husband is withholding sex. He has done this before, and I know you are probably going to say I shouldn’t have married someone so childish and selfish. But, I did, and now I just need to figure out what to do going forward. I’ve given him … Continue reading I Just Got Married And It Isn’t Going Well

Please help me understand and deal with my introverted relatives! I am extroverted and thrive on interaction with others. When I have been left alone without human contact for too long, I begin to go a little batty. Over Thanksgiving, my sibling + spouse + kids came over to my folks’ place for dinner. I watched as my sibling … Continue reading Are My Relatives Introverts Or Just Jerks?

I’ve seen a lot of talk about combating bi and femme invisibility lately, which is pretty great. But I’m still struggling with some conflicting feelings. How do I, a bisexual, femme woman in a long-term relationship with a man celebrate who I am without seeming like I’m just trying to join a Special Pony parade? Let’s be … Continue reading It’s Complicated

People at work seem to want to know details about my chronic condition. I’ve told them that I have fibromyalgia, which is why I sometimes miss work. They ask questions about my medications and doctors. I’d rather not discuss these things. It doesn’t help that they talk freely about their colds, headaches, surgeries, hot flashes, etc. What should I do? … Continue reading How Do I Avoid Talking About My Illness At Work?