I am a woman back dating men again for the first time in many years which is stressful enough but I’m also in a complicated, non-monogamous situation that has me looking for open-minded, tolerant people to date. I’ve already had many creepy responses to my online dating profile and one chat with someone who seemed really … Continue reading How Do I Weed Out Creeps?

Note: I won't be having Poly Roundups as the Gentle Butch anymore -- I will answer these questions individually and with the loving attention they deserve. I am a 49-year-old bisexual cisman who has been partnered for more than ten years with two older het-married women. One of them is polyamorous; the other is not. So when … Continue reading Poly Roundup

My four-year-old child persists in thinking that certain things are okay for girls and not okay for boys, despite numerous attempts on my part to clear this up for her. The voice of her friends is stronger than evidence I have displayed to the contrary or me just flat-out disputing her claims. How can I convince … Continue reading How Can I Convince My Four-Year-Old That Gender Binaries Are Artificial?

My delightful, amazing, young teen daughter is bi. Her friends know and her immediate family knows, but she hasn’t discussed her sexuality with the extended family. She doesn’t want to talk to them about it, but she’s a pretty open person, so they are likely to know sooner or later (probably sooner, thanks to social media). Can … Continue reading How Do I Protect My Bisexual Teen Daughter?

In good news, I don’t have cancer. In less good news, surgery needs to be involved to maintain the status quo. I had a salpingo-oopherectomy this summer (and let me tell you hot flashes are ridiculous and I would like to trade them in on a puppy), and will be having a prophylactic double mastectomy with … Continue reading How Do I Explain That I’m Not Transitioning?

Since at least junior high (around 16 years ago) I’ve suffered from what I now know is the wonderful anxiety/depression combo pack. And for twelve of those years, I’ve also enjoyed the feeling of multiple torn vertebral discs that won’t heal and associated arthritis. For the most part, fortunately, my mental and physical issues have stayed on … Continue reading How Do I Deal With the Emotional Side of Disability?

why do people jump wen thy are excited? Thanks, Luca, Age 5 Dear Luca, Well, some people jump up and down when they are excited. Like most five-year-olds. People like me with neurological issues (when I unexpectedly see my friend Johanna, who has cerebral palsy,  a jolt of happiness runs through us and we both jerk and … Continue reading Why Do People Jump When They Are Excited?

My brother has two children – a 7-year-old boy and 6-year-old girl. His wife is CATHOLIC – in all caps. Their wedding included something like five priests (I can’t remember exactly, I just remember it was well above the required quantity). Their son is named after two popes. She once stated that she believes that athletes who pray more … Continue reading How Can I Subtly Undermine A Fanatically Religious Upbringing?

I have a fairly diverse friends group and it’s important to me that my son (who’s four) grow up accepting of all races and creeds. However, I’m having an issue with my neighbors that I’m afraid my son may interpret as racially motivated. Two nights ago there was an issue with my neighbors down the street. The … Continue reading What Do I Do When My White Privilege Is Showing?

I am a 42 year old single woman. I have been struggling my whole adult life between solitude and the intimacy of a romantic relationship. I cherish closeness with people above all else, and derive much pleasure from my friendships and family. Sometimes I don’t feel human without the added intimacy that a sexual or romantic relationship brings … Continue reading Am I Just An Irredeemable Spinster At Heart?