Dear Gentle Butch, I'm demisexual and I'm 23 (she/her), I'm dating a 24 yo woman, we have been together for 6 years (4 before she came out as trans girl). Months before quarantine she express she wanted to experience sex with men, but didn't wanted to break up cause she still loved me. Since we … Continue reading Is it cheating or polyamory?
ethics
How do I handle my unapologetically racist son?
Dear Gentle Butch, My oldest son has become an unapologetic racist. He has opined that black and Hispanic people are unintelligent, destructive, and without self control. He has told me and my husband that we’re naïve and can’t face facts we don’t like. His comments on these subjects have ranged from dispassionate observations to mean-spirited … Continue reading How do I handle my unapologetically racist son?
Her fiancé’s oversharing gets under her skin.
Dear Gentle Butch, I am the luckiest woman, engaged to a sweet, soft butch (my term, not hers) who loves me as much as I love her. One of the things that I love most about her is how she loves so many friends and family and builds deep, emotional relationships. On the other hand, … Continue reading Her fiancé’s oversharing gets under her skin.
How do I support my awful coworker’s daughter?
Dear Gentle Butch, I work in a small office of only a few people. My least-favorite coworker (I'll call her Susan) has a teenage daughter (Hannah), who is queer, but is not out to her family. (It's complicated how I came to know this.) And, while I have met Hannah a few times, we don't … Continue reading How do I support my awful coworker’s daughter?
Yet another woman thinks everything’s her fault.
Dear Gentle Butch, There was a guy, "Joel," who I had some feelings for and ended up sleeping with once (we were both single at the time). After that happened, we never actually spoke about it, which was occasionally awkward since we both did a lot of work for the same small organization and had … Continue reading Yet another woman thinks everything’s her fault.
How do I break up with my massage therapist?
How do I break up with my massage therapist? I have been seeing a massage therapist for almost a year, and I have recently developed very strong feelings for him. There is no chance of me pursuing a relationship with him — aside from his professional obligation to not date clients, he is straight and … Continue reading How do I break up with my massage therapist?
How Do I Handle a Possibly Disabled Bicyclist After an Accident?
The other day in my van, when exiting a parking lot and joining traffic, I struck a cyclist whom I didn’t see because he was coming at me against traffic from behind a relatively blind corner. (Everybody is fine.) My issue is that the fellow, who was alone, seemed to have a disability of some kind, but … Continue reading How Do I Handle a Possibly Disabled Bicyclist After an Accident?
The Gentle Butch 